The so-called “personality disorders” are inclinations of thought, emotionality and behavior that characterize some people, in a rather marked and rigid way, that is, without the ability to modulate with respect to opportunities and external obstacles. But above all, if we are talking about a disorder, it can be understood in the medical sense that the person suffers from it, because at the same time he cannot find satisfaction by behaving in a different way from what his personality indicates to him as right, sensible and correct, and d the other part realizes that this way of doing it condemns him to failure, conflict or marginalization.
Personality disorders are probably a way of describing the same disorders called by other names, focusing more on the relational aspects than on the symptoms highlighted on the person or indicated by the person.
Those in group B include borderline, histrionic, narcissistic, and antisocial profiles. These are non-exclusive profiles, that is, those who have traits of one type often also have other types, so they are modalities that can coexist in various combinations. They are also called “dramatic” personalities, because their salient aspect and emotionality and conflicting, intense and explosive, or ambivalent relationships, with phases of strong bonding and investment and phases of disappointment and destructiveness. Often those who suffer from it oscillate between moments of strong sense of identity, with extreme clarity of objectives, values ​​and people of reference or inspiration, and periods of general perplexity, demotivation, identity crises, thoughts of renunciation and escape. It could be said that narcissism is more masculine, the borderline ambisexual,
The turbulent love life is a feature, and that’s why we chose to give an idea of ​​what a triptych of songs are. “You are beautiful” by Loredana Berte could well represent the female narcissistic personality. In this song, a love story that has ended, perhaps for a long time, is recalled, but which still makes the singers suffer. In the solitude of her present with her, the woman remembers the early stages of the story, when he was perhaps playing at being in love with her, but she seemed to be truly and hopelessly so. After that, over time the same man became cold, and words of love were replaced by those of indifference or contempt. This second part and perhaps only the lack of love, experienced by the narcissist as a fall from heaven, a lack of attention dedicated to him. When the histrionic can no longer be acclaimed, and realizes that he can no longer seduce, that he can no longer arouse interest, his way out is always being on stage, at the center of history and attention, but changing part . From a cheerful mask to a desperate one. Often with this attitude the histrionic permanently distances loved ones from himself, or creates conflicts during physiological phases of cooling of relationships, which he experiences as betrayal and deep wound. The best thing the histrionic finds in others is the thought of pleasing them, that others are an enthusiastic “audience”, eager for new performances and automatically seduced by any appearance or performance. of no longer being able to arouse interest, his way out and always be on stage, at the center of history and attention, but changing sides. From a cheerful mask to a desperate one. Often with this attitude the histrionic permanently distances loved ones from himself, or creates conflicts during physiological phases of cooling of relationships, which he experiences as betrayal and deep wound. The best thing the histrionic finds in others is the thought of pleasing them, that others are an enthusiastic “audience”, eager for new performances and automatically seduced by any appearance or performance. of no longer being able to arouse interest, his way out and always be on stage, at the center of history and attention, but changing sides. From a cheerful mask to a desperate one. Often with this attitude the histrionic permanently distances loved ones from himself, or creates conflicts during physiological phases of cooling of relationships, which he experiences as betrayal and deep wound. The best thing the histrionic finds in others is the thought of pleasing them, that others are an enthusiastic “audience”, eager for new performances and automatically seduced by any appearance or performance. histrionic permanently distances loved ones from himself, or creates conflicts during physiological phases of cooling of relationships, which he experiences as betrayal and deep wound. The best thing the histrionic finds in others is the thought of pleasing them, that others are an enthusiastic “audience”, eager for new performances and automatically seduced by any appearance or performance. histrionic permanently distances loved ones from himself, or creates conflicts during physiological phases of cooling of relationships, which he experiences as betrayal and deep wound. The best thing the histrionic finds in others is the thought of pleasing them, that others are an enthusiastic “audience”, eager for new performances and automatically seduced by any appearance or performance.
The narcissist also has a deep connection with the admiration that others give him, but he does not tend to be the protagonist, he simply is pleased with how others see him, he must keep a part, a mask, without provoking, but measuring in the behavior of others as much as it manages to condition and influence them. When others “escape”, or are simply not willing to overcome certain limits, the narcissistic reaction is anger and hostility, because the person who does not support and does not follow the narcissist in his proposals is perceived as rejecting, a source of humiliation. The narcissist conceives of a bond as an unconditional loyalty, and the exception to this law as a betrayal, a provocation, which in a sense he expected. The counterattack is violent, hostile, imposing. This reaction is usually unsuccessful, as it simply arouses fear, mutual hostility, legal trouble for the initiation of nagging or threatening attitudes, if not worse. The narcissist is sung by Luigi Tenco in “Angela”, in which the man treats his woman with disdain, making her feel unimportant, exploiting his love to make her suffer and therefore feeling on the side of who is stronger, leaving her and taking her back to never make her feel safe. But when she leaves him, tired of all this, he reacts with desperation, trying to take her back this time with the card of pity and repentance. Once this fails, the aggressive phase often begins. if not worse. The narcissist is sung by Luigi Tenco in “Angela”, in which the man treats his woman with disdain, making her feel unimportant, exploiting his love to make her suffer and therefore feeling on the side of who is stronger, leaving her and taking her back to never make her feel safe. But when she leaves him, tired of all this, he reacts with desperation, trying to take her back this time with the card of pity and repentance. Once this fails, the aggressive phase often begins. if not worse. The narcissist is sung by Luigi Tenco in “Angela”, in which the man treats his woman with disdain, making her feel unimportant, exploiting his love to make her suffer and therefore feeling on the side of who is stronger, leaving her and taking her back to never make her feel safe. But when she leaves him, tired of all this, he reacts with desperation, trying to take her back this time with the card of pity and repentance. Once this fails, the aggressive phase often begins. But when she leaves him, tired of all this, he reacts with desperation, trying to take her back this time with the card of pity and repentance. Once this fails, the aggressive phase often begins. But when she leaves him, tired of all this, he reacts with desperation, trying to take her back this time with the card of pity and repentance. Once this fails, the aggressive phase often begins.
Often the narcissist, when he is successful with one partner, accumulates others, arriving at problematic management of multiple relationships at the same time.
The borderline subject is particularly turbulent and unstable, so as not to be able to distinguish between emotional “ghosts”, such as fears, dreams and hopes and realities on which to make decisions or make moves, or build memories. Thus, the borderline subject lives in his emotional world, but what he attributes to others, or expects from others, or reproaches others are essentially his own emotional experiences. After that, often in this continuous conflict, it also ends up making relationships work badly, with consequent objective failures, abandonments and disappointments. The borderline’s reaction to disappointment is extreme, often with self-harm, destructive or provocative impulsive gestures, taking drugs, or failing to fulfill essential responsibilities. The borderline attributes moods and bad moods to others, create friends and enemies according to the mood, remember wrongs suffered or happy days according to the mood that colors the memory. The borderline lives with his mood of the moment, and this is the key with which he re-reads his entire history from scratch, at every turn, with consequent fragmentation of his own history and identity. In the song “Men do not change” Mia Martini interprets this way of feeling well, in which the illusion that others change is turned as an accusation against those who “do not change”, disappointing expectations. A story of illusions and delusions, without being able to “enter” into relationship with others except with an illusion, and in the end in the belief that illusion is what it should be,
In general, these disorders therefore have in common the centrality of the love life, the tendency to blame others for the failure of one’s love efforts, and the tendency to seek relationships in which to realize one’s illusions to the point of causing the feared disappointments with the same behaviors that fueled the illusions. The narcissist with control, the histrionic with the need for admiration, the borderline with impulsiveness, alienate partners, and use these same weapons to avenge them: the histrionic with accusations, the narcissist with the idea of ​​revenge, the borderline with violent acts on oneself or on others.
Angela by Luigi Tenco http://www.youtube.com/watch
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Sei Bellissima by Loredana Berte http://www.youtube.com/watch
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Men don’t change by Mia Martini http://www.youtube.com/watch
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